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Board: /adv/
"/adv/ - Advice" is 4chan's board for giving and receiving advice.
Not interested in "just accept yourself." I really think a lot of this stems from childhood issues that affect you. I can speak to this because my interest in fetishes is a lot lower now after having done a fair bit of inner work over the last little while. I personally am only into femdom - no cuck stuff - but ik they come from a similar set of problems so good books on either could probably be beneficial.
This a thread for questions and answers. If what you're posting is not a reply to another anon, it *MUST* be in the form of a question. This is NOT the place for blog posts! (Seriously, take that shit to Plebbit where it belongs!)
The following are also not allowed, because they are against /adv/ rules:
- NSFW images.
- Posting personal details, or pictures of yourself.
- Racism (only allowed on /b/).
- Trolling, ragebaiting, pretending to be retarded, etc. (again, only allowed on /b/).
Note, however, that there is also an ATOGA thread on /soc/ - if you feel the need to post toonme images or contact details then try there.
The following are technically allowed, but there are better places to post them, and they're considered off-topic here:
- Politics (take it to /pol/).
- Gender wars or incel rants (take them to /r9k/).
- Discussion of LGBT issues (try /lgbt/!).
- Miscellaneous ranting and venting. (Elsewhere on /adv/ there is a thread called GIOYC - Get It Off Your Chest - which is the place for that).
If you have a technical, scientific, medical, or legal question, then you certainly *can* post it here, but you're more likely to get a useful response if you start your own separate thread.
Please help to make this thread better by REPORTING all off-topic, low quality, or rule-breaking posts that you see!
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Previously on ATOGA: >>32914050
I quit porn and I'm doing Nofap. Also I am doing kegels too. But I won't lie anons I'm a bit scared. I've never been able to have proper sex because I couldn't get hard. I went soft in seconds
Adding women into this makes my life infinitely more complex, not complex in a way that is satisfying, but in a way that is frustrating. They are obnoxious, childish, nagging, cause all sorts of headaches and annoyances, and all for what, sex? I mean it's good but it's not worth what you lose.
All of my previous relationships have ended up like this. Women just take up way too much time and energy, they take away your free time and they take away your freedom. Am I autistic or something?
>He'll think about it
>Friend mentions that restaurant once
>He wants to go
>Talks about concert
>He says maybe
>Friend brings up same concert
>We go, even without friend
>Say I want to go to Japan
>He sits on it for 2 years
>Friends say they're going now he wants to go
>I say I'm not interested
>His friends will probably go to karaoke bars and drink all day
>We eat dinner silently
Anons, am I doing something wrong? I've asked about this pattern repeatedly and he just laughs about it. Dating for 5 years and I still don't understand this man. His friends are also gay and have TDS so a trip with them would be tolerable at best and at the worse I lose my shit at them.
Hurt my back almost 10 years ago when i was a teenager, almost mid 20s now and just had an unrelated surgery. Right before surgery my back actually fixed itself. A month has passed since my surgery and i can now finally workout. I have broad shoulders and a very broad chest, what excercises do i do to get rid of this girly hourglass shape?
This is because the other two know each other better and can form a natural conversation. I only interject when there's a pause of more than a couple of seconds, because otherwise I end up speaking at the same time as someone else and I think it's rude to talk over someone.
This leads to people describing me as "autistically quiet" or "a ghost of a human being," which makes me feel bad and start saying things that are embarrassingly uninsightul or unfunny just to avoid those labels.
But it's also true that I am more reserved than the average person.
I'm looking to improve my presence in these situations, and I see the following as tools to use:
1. Talk for as long as possible when I get the chance
2. Interrupt when I have something I'd really like to say
3. Talk in a loud and confident manner
4. Use more tonal range, facial expressions, gestures, laughter, emotion
5. Take better mental notes to build a better understanding of these people and connect details from earlier to the current topic to show I'm interested in learning about them
6. If someone calls me quiet, casually accept it and explain that I'm still learning about what they like to talk about
7. Garner a reputation for things I do so that people feel familiar with me before talking to me
8. If I don't know what to say at an interjection point, always fill the silence with a clarifying question and before they can answer it talk at length about why I'm interested to know, restate my understanding up to the point of the question, and talk about the consequences of what possible answers would be
9. Build a deep understanding of a few different interesting topics and direct the conversation towards that
Do these look good? I have trouble doing each of these for various reasons, but I'm trying.
Anything you would change or add?
>NEET for basically entire life
>no high school or college education
>dropped out of school in 9th grade
>never worked
>have left house maybe 6 times in past 15 years
>0 social skills
>never had a face to face interaction with someone my own age throughout my teens and 20s
>5'7”
>never had a job
>can't drive
>never had friends
>parents are broke so I won't inherit anything
>no skills
>never exercised in my entire life
>Epilepsy
>intense fear of owls. Went to therapy for it (not cured)
>have had probably fewer than 10 irl interactions within the past 20 years
How do I get out of this? I've literally just played video games since dropping out of high school when I was 15. It was pretty fun but my parents' money is running out. How hard are 6 figure jobs to get?
But I don't believe in giving women a lick of stray attention cause frankly they don't need it from me. But I do find when its a girl and her girlfriends they tend to gravitate their "tables"/groups around me , I can overhear their conversations (I can't see them) and they tend to do this weird "IDK..hahaha...something something about the topic...other weird noises/loud laughing" as if trying to get attention and the weirdest part and this is what trips me / makes me write this...the conversation more than a few times has devolved into "ewww" and unless ewww is super common phrase for the latest zoomer crop of girls , I can't help but feel like I'm the only common denominator and they are mocking me.
But are they fucking testing me or trying to get my attention? To see if I'll budge or break?
I'm trying to see if I should take this behavior as a win (even if it ends in a loss because it ends in them mocking me cause they don't get what they want) that I'm on the radar for even a little bit now
Or is this a catastrophic loss that I will never be seen as a viable match because groupthink prevails...
>hanging out with lesbian friend who is going through a "what am i" phase because she broke up with her she/they ass girlfriend
>she's on my couch, i'm like "hey, come a bit closer"
>she's cute but is extremely liberal and we've argued over politics before, probably wouldn't make a good couple because of it. she's also extremely social justice minded but is extremely patient and open minded with me even when we've had disagreements
>she sits behind me and begins playing with my hair, i touch her feet, her legs, lean back against her
>i decide to be spontaneous and kiss the back of her hand
>she doesn't mind it, i play it off as a joke
>she continues playing with my hair
>"you know, i really only see you as a friend right?"
>"h-haha yeah of course"
>she kisses the top of my head
>wtf.jpeg
I don't really know what happened. Should I try to do something again? I think it was just a completely spontaneous thing and I don't really know if we'd make a good couple. I just think she's kinda hot and she's also very patient/affectionate with me. It was also surreal because I haven't been held like that in 7 years.
I can't count on my neighbors, since it's mostly Indians who will not call 911 because they fear charges.
I live in an apartment complex and my parents pay the rent. I am 19, clean record and not on any psycho-active medications.
Can they legally evict me on basis of me owing a gun?
Silicon valley territorially.
In hindsight I definitely should've reached out WAY WAY sooner. Like at most 1-3 months. The funny thing is over the course of this week I was trying to suppress the feeling of excitement I had of meeting her again. Told myself it was just going to be a cool meetup and that I wouldn't care too much or be phased, but after receiving that text I'm just feeling it all well up again. Not nearly as strongly as the initial heartbreak, but my chest feels hot pressure. When we broke up she asked me to stay in her life because she was going through some stuff. I wish I had back then.
Anyways this is a good learning experience for me I think, in the future reach out a week or two after the breakup instead of going cold for 8 months. Or alternatively maybe I don't reach out to my ex.
But man moving on is hard, I did so much over the last few months and I feel like over the course of 2 weeks I set myself back significantly. How did you guys move on from your exes? Can you ever truly forget? Or at least find happiness again?
the problem is i reaaaallly dont want to go.
anybody have any good things to say to get out of it without seeming like a dick?
So, if you were learning the piano from scratch without any prior experience, how would you go about it?
I dont see myself being able to get a girlfriend. Like not only because of how shit the dating market is now, but also how shit i am before things got messed up. Theres a ton of very uncomfortable feelings associated with all of this and i just dont see myself, at nearly 30, fixing it all and it mattering. I should have fixed it ten years ago. When it mattered.
I look at the prices and sometimes wonder if i should use that money, which is between $400-$800, and go on vacation. I mean is an hour long experience that makes me feel good for a month worth that?
i have been with my girlfriend since november 2022. we are both in college and about the same amount of busy (which isn't much to begin with). things started out great -- we made out a lot, had a lot of sexytalk, and had non-penetrative sex. she was always showing me new lingerie she bought or talking about things she wanted to do with me during sex, all that kind of stuff. life was good.
and then a few months after we started dating, she just... slowly phased all of that out. she stopped wanting to make out with me, she stopped doing any sort of intimate thing with me nearly full stop after like 5 months in. at this point, it's been around 2 years since we did anything even remotely spicy. for a long time, i had copium about it because i didn't realize that this was about to be a long term thing, and i kept telling myself that certainly, my girlfriend will want to do SOMETHING with me any day now. i have pretty much long since given up on that.
Ill start
was the Ethiopian eunuch a sigma male?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.
>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard these days, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, have given up, or insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!
>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question.
>Resources and Books
Wingman.live: https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach)
"Models": https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612
Wingmam: https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq
(new suggestions with working links are welcome)
REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.
Previous: >>32845475
How am I supposed to live knowing that i'm almost a quarter of a century old and not a single woman has ever liked me enough to be my gf or even just sleep with me?
Am I just meant to continue accepting this? Because to me this is almost a declaration of war by women.
The anger, desperation and agony are growing increasingly by the day. I'm in my final year of university but I gave up on it completely, gave up on submitting assignments, haven't touched my final year project since last year and i'm ignoring my supervisor's emails.
I just can't sit there looking at fucking code knowing that i'm about to be a 24yo virgin.
Holy shit holy is this even possible
It's just that it's 27th year of my life and I haven't done shit. I don't care about the usual stuff like money, GFs, sex, creating a family, pursuing a career, getting some material shit like a house or a car, but there's nothing else that would ring a bell in me. Hell, I can't even boast about the amount of movies, series, cartoons, anime, vidiya or any other media that I've consumed because my list of these is pretty thin.
In terms of arts, crafts and any other skills and abilities, I have none beside reading things quickly and writing long texts like this OP-post. There were some attempts at drawing and programming but they haven't last very long because my general interest in these things was low. I've read a load about many things that I could do at my home with a computer as well as about many other things, but nothing really made me just go and do this or that. Even as a kid I haven't done anything in particular beside playing with my toys, watching TV, reading books and doodling stuff, so I have no points of reference in my past that I could use now nor do I have any right now.
So what can I even do about? I was supposed to sort this shit in my school years or even earlier, but not now being a grown-ass adult.
First rule: Never let women choose, make choices for them so that they follow you with less hesitation.
Second rule: Power perceived is power achieved. You're never weak and everything you achieve is done behind the closed doors. Never let them enter your real world.
Let's talk about these.
This thread is not for weak men who think being kind and funny is a positive trait for sexual attraction. Goes without saying this thread is also not for actual women, fuck off.
You say "not all apples are rotten so the apple tree shouldn't be burned down" and they say "you really hate when cherry trees grow here huh"
I'm honestly thinking of cutting ties with all my friends and family, and getting a dog. Is this a good idea?
And yet every time i know she will be in ours hangouts it instantly enlightens my day and makes me eager to be there. Am i stupid?
I don't really know how to respond. I have often had trouble cumming if I am not going fast, but to be honest I had never considered my average pace of sex "rough". To be fair, I had only really had experience with hook-ups, casual situations, and then not very long relationships. Me and my girl have been together a long while now, but I guess I'll have to relearn sex. I barely ever masturbate anymore, maybe 1-2 times a month - sometimes more sometimes a bit less. She had suggested maybe I had the "death grip" problem, which I may have in the past but I'm not sure that's it when I barely ever jerk off anymore.
I trust her and don't want to hurt her at all, so this has kinda blindsided me a bit. She's being very careful and considerate in how she's put it to me, tells me she still wants to have sex but that the constant soreness/pain had been making her avoidant of intimacy lately and she was nervous to bring it up. I'm going to be understanding about it - but it is pretty big change. I don't really know what to do to help, I guess I have to embrace some awkwardness and discomfort going forward and try to work on being able to cum with "gentler" or slower sex.
>tallfag
>have bad back
>used to be okay looking before I got chubby
>go to see RMT regularly to fix my fucked back
>she's hot redhead, big tits, like picrel
>first appointment
>flip over to finish
>open my eyes to try to get a look at her tits as she's standing right over me
>I think she noticed, seemed to be mad, appointment is over
>I start losing weight
>at the end of next appointment she gives me a slight jaw/scalp massage unprompted, has never happened before
>tell her it feels good because I always have a slight headache from laying face down on the massage chair (which is true)
>she says she'll make a note of it
>next appointment
>it's been a little while, I am probably in the best shape of my life now
>she is complimenting me on my progress
>her normal massage room is in use
>the other massage table is smaller
>flip over to finish
>have to lay with my knees bent because tallfag and small table
>my cock is pressing against the sheet but I'm not hard
>she does a scalp/jaw massage again
>it is different this time
>she is running her fingers through my hair, playing with it, tapping with her fingers softly on my face, touching my ears
>boner.jpg
>my cock is twitching every time she does anything, I'm trying to think about baseball
>she just keeps going
>we go overtime
>she is definitely sitting at an angle where she can see everything
>at the end she did the move from our first appointment where her tits are right over my face
>it seems like she is leaning especially far forward and holding it for a long time
>almost like giving me a chance to look
>her face is definitely close to my hard cock
>she does it twice
>I don't want to open my eyes in case I'm wrong
>she tells me in the softest, sexiest voice I've ever heard from her that the appointment is over and smiles at me
Am I just imagining things? I know RMTs are used to this shit and there is an innocent explanation but it felt so intentional. Can I potentially take things to the next level?
Not only that but being in social situations makes me feel like I have a very limited amount of energy and need to get out of there. I get tired so quickly. When I’m relaxed I can be so quick witted and funny.
I’m good looking but my lack of social skills ruins everything for me. I expose myself to people everyday, work, uni and friend arrangements but no matter how much i expose myself to them I always dread them and I always find myself feeling genuine fear, and become a nervous stuttery boring mess. I constantly feel guilty for some reason after every human interaction. I could have so much fun and build such meaningful relationships if I could just let go of this because it’s stopped me from becoming intimate with anyone.
Is there a way to fix this? What’s wrong with me? What caused this?
What do I need to find motivation and purpose? CS major, second year. All I do is goon and vidya all day. My roommate thinks I’m a ghost, and my family knows I’m a loser.
The answer is right in front of me, just fucking push through. Yet I’m not even halfway, and I already collapsed. I tried the whole “high-quality fat and protein”, “touching grass/going outside”, “no fap/stop vidya”, etc.. It doesn’t matter. I relapse within a month or two.
I need some serious truthpill about my situation. Do I switch majors? (obviously, I’m not interested in this shit).
How tf do I find purpose in life? Something to motivate me. I’m tired all the time. I honestly don’t see myself being alive in 5 years. I hate that I was coddled and spoiled my whole life. I’m just tired of everything.
Well, it's less than three full weeks into Lent, and I am struggling hard. I am irritable, depressed, and constantly feel like I'm on the verge of breaking.
Does anybody have any tips on how to push through this? I know this probably sounds quite pathetic, however I really am having a hard time.
I recognise this as a big part of getting women. Being looser, more casual and naturally witty. Whenever I’m talking to a woman i find halfway attractive it’s like I just lock up.
Is there a fix for this?
I don’t know what to do. I feel that all my actions are rightfully and righteously executed.
Im a marine technician im 24 years old , but i had to move to another town , im struggling to find a good job with benefits and healthcare.
The employers here are also starting me at $15 an hour since they are much stricter and require more experience.
Should i just find another career or start all over again with an entry level wage.
I’m 5’8 about 270 pounds
What can I do, to appeal to women more.
>Calls me late at night, claims she forgot her wallet, can't afford a ride home after work. Asks if I can pick her up.
>I reluctantly drive to pick her up. We're still "friends," in some vague, unresolved way. I don’t love her anymore, but I still care about her.
>Awkward silence fills most of the ride.
>She breaks it "Are you seeing someone?"
>No.
>I ask if she is.
>"No, but I’ve fucked 2 few guys on the side." Nothing important or serious, they are not important for me.
>Say nothing, grip the wheel. She's not mine anymore and ive no right to express my hurt
>She shifts, moves closer. Hand on my hair.
>"Stop." I say
>She insists. I pull over. "Stop."
>Suddenly, a meltdown, tears, accusations. "Why don’t you want me mo more? Am I ugly? Am I fat?"
>then the emotional blackmail, "i didn’t need a ride. I just wanted to see you, to “fix” things."
And yet, she's oblivious to the words she just said. Oblivious to how she admitted letting other men use her holes and cum into her, then expected me to take her back, like none of it mattered?
I mean how am I supposed to want her after that? It's disgusting. And ironic, she left because I was "boring," because she wanted something different. Now, suddenly, I’m the one she wants back? I dropped her outside her apartment and blocked her number.
If I have put in my application multiple times, will they notice if they change my strat?
I'm 22 myself, but I can't relate to my own generation. I listen to 70s/80s metal, so should I dress like Lemmy and go to alt clubs?
Examples: Money
I want advice on how to deal with this grueling pain I'm feeling right now, fuck...
one of her friends was trying to ragebait me after me cutting her off because she felt like she was "fucked over". i said some not so nice things and she was pretty mad. even talked to my friend about what happened.
flash forward to now, i was thinking about her a lot and decided to friend her again on disc. she said she was shocked that i even added her back. turns out she got crossfaded every night to cope and i said all my apologies to her. she definitely wants to be friends again (we were super close, borderline boyfriend and girlfriend, but we were not flirtatious or sexual, just super close). she said she eventually stopped liking me after she did it enough times.
this will probably be horrible of me to ask, but do you think there is a chance she might like me again? should i even be friends with her? i've got an anxiety disorder and what i said was not what i believe. she said she can see her building all her trust back as well. she's not the type to have crushes at all (she's only had a crush on maybe 3 people in her 19 years of life), and she's said "idk" to the question, so i was curious what /adv/ thinks, lol.
I've been eating a ton of chocolate over the past week and my turds have been huge and hard to pass.
Like so hard to pass that they rip my anus and cause me to bleed and then clog the toilet.
Huge bricks of turds.
How do I fix this? How do I get nice soft small stools again?
Sexually, this is the worst possible thing they could have done. Morally, I value honesty above almost everything else.
I am on the verge of breaking up, but I hesitate. Please advise.
I hate going to school because of this.
If you aren't living a joyous, prosperous and fulfilling life it's a YOU problem.
Everyone in my family has assumed it to be truth that I'm gay. We're Christian, so they've been treating me like shit and trying to get me to pray the (nonexistant) gay away.
I've stopped talking to my folks and moved out. They still contact me every few weeks to remind me the gay lifestyle is a sin (and ignore anything I say about not being gay).
Asixe from having to deal with a woman, because I do not have the patience for that shit, how can I get them off my back about this? I'd rather not completely cut ties with my family but that's my next step.
What I'm getting at, is that there's so many shitty guides on how to get over an ex, but why aren't people more honest about the reality that there are people like who slip through the cracks and never recover? I wish I was told this earlier instead of trying to cope with therapy improving myself at the gym etc
Where do I find real masculine men?
How would you deal with this type of colleague at college?
>Shy and introverted
>Avoidant attachment
>Social skills not very good
>Bitter with "pessimistic" (realistic) thoughts
>Few friends
>Loneliness problems
>Excluded from groups of friends from childhood
>Bullied
>Nerd
>First boyfriend at 17 who was a jealous jerk (only boyfriend you've ever had, now you have minor traumas, at least you got over the relationship)
>Your jealous ex-boyfriend excluded you from your high school Friends group and he stay in it.
>Your friends said you have no character.
I'm 18 years old. How do I overcome that and help me feel a little more fulfilled?
I want to improve my character, to be better. Also if you could give me tips for flirting I would really appreciate it! I have a crush and I would like to get close to him.
Enter the problem: a new challenger has appeared. Dude started up just after spring break and is going full speedrun Any% Romance category. Loud, always making unfunny jokes that she has to force laughs for. I didn't know he had already gotten her number until she kept zoning out to reply to him when we were chatting.
So, /adv/ fellow scholars of the game and humble knights of unspoken feels: how do I course-correct here? Is there a way to remind her of the genuine connection we’ve been building without coming off jealous or petty? How do I win, I don't want to be the Timmy who just lets whatever happen, the line must be drawn here
I think i have tdah
I'm bisexual, and my ex is a lesbian who still bothers me a lot to try to get back together. She hates men, and the fact I'm with a guy right now is driving her insane.
My bf knows I have an ex but he assumed it was a guy and I didn't want to have the bisexual talk since a lot of people take it the wrong way when I tell them I'm bi and think I'm like a nympho or something.
My ex introduced herself as my "friend" and my bf let her into our place. I got home from work and the talk when I saw her there was a little tense but I didn't call her out directly in front of my bf, and I think my bf caught on something was up since he went pretty quiet where he's normally chatty.
Should I tell him everything or would it be better to just try to bury the history and keep my involvement with this woman vague?
>Work at hotel
>See all the cute couples checking in for the night
>Know they will all fuck
>Imagine every single one of them, as I'm alone at the reception forced to be overly friendly with all of them
Everyone gets laid and has sex except for me and I'm not even ugly, just psychologically abused
I hate it so much. How do I get out of this hole?
>Working 6 1/2 days a week
>12+ hours a day
>company keeps saying they are going to hire
>never do
>basically lying to us
>everyone is burned out
>get yelled at by clients daily due to 2+ hold times
she laid out some very clear expectations
>she wants man who will text her when hes having a bad day or sad/angry/upset about something
>she wants a man who will depend on her to have his emotional needs met
>she wants a man to tell her things he could never tell anyone else (family, friends etc)
>she belives its her job to do things for the man because its what he wants her to do regardless of how she feels
She admitted to me that she often talks about a guy friend i know just to see if it will make me angry, because she feels its the only time that I show that I "care" about her is when I tell her not to talk to other men or when I force her to go places with me.
How can I learn to be more dependent and vunerable with this girl? i like her otherwise and we have been getting along and both want to have a family someday, and I really want this to work out
Why or why not?
>no friends
>have never really had them
>can't connect with people, just scare people/make them uncomfortable
>boring. life is full of either being bullied or being alone
>not particularly attached to anything after parent's death
do i just blow my last 12k and have a fun month then hop in a suicide pod or something? i'm so tired. what are the ethics behind not suiciding if i'm miserable and nobody will miss me, literally?
This a thread for questions and answers. If what you're posting is not a reply to another anon, it *MUST* be in the form of a question. This is NOT the place for blog posts! (Seriously, take that shit to Plebbit where it belongs!)
The following are also not allowed, because they are against /adv/ rules:
- NSFW images.
- Posting personal details, or pictures of yourself.
- Racism (only allowed on /b/).
- Trolling, ragebaiting, pretending to be retarded, etc. (again, only allowed on /b/).
Note, however, that there is also an ATOGA thread on /soc/ - if you feel the need to post toonme images or contact details then try there.
The following are technically allowed, but there are better places to post them, and they're considered off-topic here:
- Politics (take it to /pol/).
- Gender wars or incel rants (take them to /r9k/).
- Discussion of LGBT issues (try /lgbt/!).
- Miscellaneous ranting and venting. (Elsewhere on /adv/ there is a thread called GIOYC - Get It Off Your Chest - which is the place for that).
If you have a technical, scientific, medical, or legal question, then you certainly *can* post it here, but you're more likely to get a useful response if you start your own separate thread.
Please help to make this thread better by REPORTING all off-topic, low quality, or rule-breaking posts that you see!
And please don't start new threads until the old one either hits its image limit or is on page 7.
Previously on ATOGA: >>32911539
Because of the stress I'm making weird mistake at the new job that are things someone of my experience should absolutely not be doing (and never have up until now) and don't even realise I've done it until it gets pointed out to me later. After the first minor error my new boss has been on my case about every single little thing now (most of which is just shit she seems to be making up on the spot), this is constantly increasing my stress and anxiety levels to the point I'm squirming in my bed every night thinking about it all. I honestly don't know what to do, I've never been someone that got stressed about anything until the last year and now its just so out of control I feel like I'm headed for a breakdown.
>0 interviews
>200 applications
>0 interviews
>500 applications
>0 interviews
we have a situation here guys. What's the next move?
Im a guitar teacher. I’m moving to the Bay Area soon and I’m hoping to make a living there by teaching guitar and playing wedding gigs and stuff. How do I best advertise my services? It’s important that I start working as soon as possible once I move there because I’m poor as shit. Anyone know a good place to hang up flyers, or a good online community to shill myself in?
How do I stop this mindset?
>they never show interest in me, always chose my friends
>doesn't matter how I act
>"Hey maybe the right one is just around the corner!"
>She never is
>Fail at job interviews and internships
>Only success is in uni, but no one cares about that lets be honest
>"It will get better!"
>Instead start bleeding out my ass
>Thought about going to the doctor
>"Eh why bother"
>just wondering if its a haemorrhoid or asscancer
>This was an year ago
What is some advice?
I don't think I'm ugly but people seem to think I'm weird and I avoid others for that reason
That section where they ask what race you are, your ethnicity, what gender you are, and whether or not you're a veteran?
Does that have any impact on whether a hiring manager is going to consider my application?
ANY impact at all?
What could be going on? I'm kind of scared to meet this lady.
A big one for me is trying to maintain cooperative attitudes towards arguments, so I'd ask if the other person is onboard with making this a value in our relationship.
I feel "willing to be vulnerable" is theoretically a deal breaker of mine, but it seems like such a stupid question because only 1 girl out of maybe 50 I've dated has told me that she would never want to be vulnerable with her partner.
I've got more, but discuss.
I have the worst life in the world there's no fixing it and I don't care. I just want to scream in a void until I do the thing.
What is a good second job in the UK? I don't mind being a 24/7 slave at this point. I just need more money.
I feel like throughout my life the women I'm actually attracted to have never been interested in me. Like, at all. Basically I am an actual autistic nerd who looks like some guy who's been to jail. I've been told I'm rather gruff and scary looking, muscular, bald, tons of scars all over from working hard jobs my whole life. My hobbies are all autistic shit: video games, anime, tv and movies, spending hours on X and YouTube, making YouTube videos, fixing/building things etc. But I also enjoy a lot of fitness things too. For whatever reason, I just look like my wife's dream husband.
I genuinely don't understand what she sees in me. Why she is so convinced we are meant to be together. Why she wants to have my kids and raise them. She has all the ideal traits one should want from a wife: fiercely loyal, extremely loving, caring, has sex almost whenever I initiate. The sex is good, probably the best thing about our relationship. I just don't really, "like" her. We have basically no shared interests at all. She can't even figure out how to play a video game. Anything animated at all she immediately doesn't understand and assumes is for kids, I have cried watching animated films several times. As a grown ass man. And again, I'm the type of guy other guys are scared of.
Also for refrence my last gf i dated for 5 years and we had a kid anx after 2 years of raising August (i named him) we took a pat test and it turns out he wasnt my kid and then she left me and never let me see him again. I read that as a sign from ol g-d to keep playing rock and roll forever but now a new challenger woman appears... im worried if i dont listen to god ill be punished and ill regret bei g a family man instead of trying as hard as i can to become a semi successful musician.
Pic rel is the lady in question
lifes hell
My professor hasn’t been helpful throughout the project. For example, I was supposed to draw a sectional system and followed a template he provided. Later, he told me it wasn’t enough, but when I asked what was missing, he said he didn’t know.
He also seems to favor certain students. One student who was sick over the holidays was allowed an extended deadline, while I was told extensions were only given in “exceptional cases” based on his judgment.
On top of that, he scheduled a meeting with me to review my project and grade, but it turned out he had an exam to supervise at the same time. I waited in the room, checking in occasionally, but after the exam, he just left without speaking to me. He also ignored my follow-up email.
Now, he has given me an unfairly low grade, and I don’t know what to do. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? What are my options?
>one super fat and masculine
>one cute
>fat one expresses interest in me
>I flat out shoot her down
>kinda like the other one and I see her looking at me everytime I'm around
>just got rejected two times recently so I still feel a bit raw
>afraid I'll look like an asshole for rejecting fat girl and going for other one
>still want to
>barely have even talked to other girl so far
>probably doesn't even like me and it's just my imagination
>start to feel like I'm like the fat girl from most girl's perspective
>super demoralized
I don't know what to do. I feel like time is running out and I already am making a bad impression on the new girl that I like. I want her and I don't want to fuck it up. What should I do?
I'll admit: I do it. not for luxury or DEI. I only steal things of actual, nessesary and lasting value & investment. I don't steal fashion, junk food, recreational items or electronics. I steal fruit trees, fruit bushes, tomato & pepper plants. I used to buy & pay for them, up until about 2 years ago. I kept buying & planting trees for our orchard. despite irrigation, soil ammendment & proper planting; I was losing about 1/3 of what we planted. similar but different for the garden plants. we seed start, but our climate is harsh & unforgiving. we have had some tragic die offs due to not-so-uncommon-anymore "freak" weather & temperature flows.
It started after I tried to exchange 2 trees that had a 1 year live guarantee. I had receipts & all proof they said they require, including digging & bringing the trees. when the store Mgr would not honor it.... the rest has become history.
we live WAY the fuck out here, are poor despite working 40+hrs week at a paying job, then farming on evenings and weekends for supplimental food & calories. the trees are obviously not producing now, they are an "investment" in our future food security. we raise and buther rabbits, ducks & sheep for our meat and trade.
we live paycheck to paycheck, hand to mouth. we have the basics: farm truck & wifemobile (40 years old combined) a roof over our heads, water, sewage & tools of my trade. I make sure to keep auto, home, health and life insurance... our "luxury spending" in case of a disaster.
I got fucking sick of seeing our "elite ruling class" steal with impunity while taxing and stealing from me like a peasant.
am I a total degenerate?
Severance - (2 months of being employed, 1 month of severence)
$450k in stocks/crypto
$20k cash
Severence and NEET bennies - $50k.
Do I go abroad for like 3-4 months and chill or nah? Feels like I won’t get another chance like this and I wanna recover.
So how do i approach my family doctor to be referred to a psychiatrist (I would go straight to one but being referred means it doesn't cost an arm and a leg)
I suck at opening up i can never properly say how i feel and what im dealing with i always down play it or just straight up lie since its the only thing i know. If i do get referred how do i be taken seriously and understood?
Any advice would be appreciated