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Board: /adv/
"/adv/ - Advice" is 4chan's board for giving and receiving advice.
By middle school, I was extremely lonely and depressed. My grades started slipping because I was too depressed to care. I reached out to my family, teachers, and school authority figures for help, but all they gave me was empty platitudes.
I've never truly been a kid or a teenager. My life was robbed of me due to things outside of school. I turn 30 in a few months and the last time I laughed, smiled, or truly enjoyed anything was almost 20 years ago.
I have nothing. No childhood memories, no friendships, no real family. I have no life.
I desperately wish to change this and start living life, but nothing fills the void of having no childhood. I'm not even half a person, I'm a complete blank with nothing. I missed on all of the experiences a person needs to become a healthy, well-adjusted person. It's hard to keep going when you're alone and have nothing back to look back on and nothing to look forward do.
Is there any way I can turn things around and start enjoying life?
I mean my sister just recently became one and she's making about 40 cad per hour right off the bat with the possibility of making 50 plus in another couple years if she gets some kind of pharmacy related cert or something of that nature.
I ran the numbers and around where I live (one of the lowest income provinces in Canada) that means after taxes she'd be netting northwards of 20k cad above what the average household in my province does and since she's just starting out and the demand for healthcare professionals keeps rising due to all the old people round here it's likely this is a wage which will continue to go up, potentially nullifying or even beating inflation a bit over time.
So if i was making that kinda money and avoided rent by continuing to chill at my parents place for most of that time (obviously still providing for myself and doing chores around the house and such).
Then theoretically speaking if I'm frugal enough with my spending habits
(should be easy since i have a mental condition that basically makes me that way automatically) and make some wise passive investment decisions I should be capable of emassing enough wealth to go buy a little luxury villa/property or something along those lines in a foreign country like Thailand or Paraguay or Costa Rica or something and just go chill there while coasting off my savings and passive investment income by the time I'm age 50ish right?
Seems to me like a pretty solid life plan that would position me far ahead of most of my peers financially speaking if everything winds up working out for the most part.
>I have homicidal urges. I haven't acted on them yet. Thank God. But I have caught myself before I've done anything serious. My thoughts have been getting more harmful in this manner, Ill often find myself thinking about it without batting an eye and snap out of it, trying to not project it. Often times, they're directed to Gays, trans folks and sometimes minority.
My second problem is a little different:
>I have a boyfriend, hes the cutest most loveable guy I have in my life and hes not real. He's Imaginary. Obviously no one else knows about this but me, but I always feel better whenever I talk to him or when I get physical with him. Of course I feel guilty about it because I hate gay people, but It feels so good when he caresses my face.
Im not sure. Every day seems like I hate and hate more. I feel like Ill never be able to sink my teeth into my vices or my arms in a true embrace of my boyfriend.
Any advice?
How do you accept that you're ugly?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.
>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard these days, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, who have given up, or who insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can fuck off to.
BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!
>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc...
Don't forget to ask an actual question.
>Books and Resources
"Models": https://ufile.io/f/jrw9j (expired?)
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://libgen.li/edition.php?id=143167290
"Mystery Method": https://pastebin.com/cMHcY4dc (old pastebin)
"The Pussy": https://z-lib.is/book/the-pussy-
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/ (a bit cringe but decent advice)
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq (something to listen to)
(not all of these are fully vetted, new suggestions are welcome)
REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.
Previous: >>31091261
>be me white guy in my 30s from an eastern euro shithole visiting Japan for the first time
>I tell all my Japanese contacts on LINE I am coming to see if anyone wants to show me around
>One woman says she wants to meet me on my last day here
>She's a married woman in her late 30s and speaks no English at all and I use the translator all the time
>We meet because why not?
>She tells me she's getting separated but she really want kids and tells me if I could be a sperm donor for her. all I need to do is shoot into a cup and she has a syringe and will do the rest from there and asks me if we can go to a hotel and not to worry because her husband knows about this and he's sterile.
>I hesitate but my naive self goes "hmmm a lot of people do that. so okay I guess." but I tell her she needs to pay for the hotel herself which she does
>we arrive, get comfy, take a shower, etc
>I tell her "okay, I am ready. do you have the cup?"
>she starts kissing me passionately and pinned me down. I couldn't even react.
>ughhhh I have a girlfriend back at home but I'm so fucking turned on right now I can't stop.
>she tells me to cum inside her and I do
>morning after I'm in a rush to get to the airport to catch my flight back home
>she asks me "will I ever see you again? I really wanna see you again..." to which I reply "I don't know"
>Arrive home
>Don't even have the courage to tell my gf what I did
>keep contact with the jap, she didn't get pregnant but she's getting divorced and she really likes me. She posted a picture of the divorce papers. to be honest, I like her too
I should just break up with my girlfriend to be with her, right? We were stable and living together but I can't pretend anymore.
>22 years old warehouse wagie
>go to work
>go to gym after
>read some books, meditate and browse 4chan
>eat clean, no drugs/alcohol, no junk
>go to sleep
>been doing this for 2 years
>have 50k saved up
I plan on doing this for another 8 years. No friends or gf. I've never even hung out with people outside of school before. Never went to restaurants, had social media, flirted with girls, drink or smoke before, partied etc.. but man I'm still so content with life. Sometimes I just come from work and lay on my bed, stare at my ceiling and enjoy the sunlight brimming through my window until I fall asleep. I find it an admirable goal to be a virgin by 30. Doesn't really bother me and I'm looking forward to it. What are the consequences of my life choices?
Will she continue puberty or will she have a 14 year old’s body forever? Are there cases of delayed onset puberty? Should we normalise relationships between men in their 30s and teens?
>atletic and low-bf
>6 pack
>brown (not exactly black) with green eyes
>~5cm taller than me
>chiseled jawline
>brocolli haircut
I'm willing to fucking pay to suck his dick, but I am kinda afraid of talking to him because he is very thug-like and probably has a gun, and even if he doesn't he could certaintely beat me to a pulp (I'm a skinny white dude). The fact that he lives near me makes it even more scary.
How can I approach him in a way that doesn't get me killed?
I'm trying to find hobbies and meet other people.
Am i getting punished for something or what the fuck is this shit?
ive been struggling with feeling of bisexuality for over a decade at this point, and while i am truly ashamed that i feel this way, part of me wonders if it would make things better if i came out of the closet.
unfortunately it feels like doing this would completely ruin my life. this is all from my perspective so i could be wrong but i dont feel like i am. tldr im insecure and have boomer parents
pros of coming out
>can say faggot
>friends would probably accept me
cons of coming out
>parents 100% disown me
>relationships with friends will change permanently, they might think im trying to fuck them
>im supposed to be the straight guy of the group in my head
>cant date a guy anyways, the stress of hiding the relationship would prevent me from enjoying it
>already struggle with masculinity
>already told my friends im straight a million times while knowing im not
>probably wouldnt make me hate myself any less
am i wrong in this? or should i just keep it to myself and maybe learn to be straight again? anons pls help
I am currently dating a girl who is a 4/10 chinese random with nice tits and a good ass.
We had a one night stand and I busted in her, I also fucked her the second time I saw her.
Problem, she literally works at a jack shack / "massage parlour" where we fucks other dudes for money.
pursue this relationship - yes/no?
Notes: She speaks hardly any English. Not sure if she's even a resident in this country.
Notes: I am a complete loser and she was the first girl I fucked raw and came inside of, she loves to fuck me, apparently I have a huge dong.
What's the most environmentally responsible way to get rid of it? Options I've considered
>Burn it
>Let it evaporate
>Pour it on the ground
>Pour it down a storm drain
Almost a year into it he had developed feelings for me but the way he told me about it was that he thought we were dating already all this time. I had no idea why? I never accepted any invitations to hang out outside of work and I never invited him over (sometimes other coworkers would come and visit after work) to my house. I made sure to be so careful for this exact reason. I told him that I didn't see him that way and to kill any feelings he had for me. I gave him space and asked to be moved at work. I honestly liked the coworker friendship we had and wanted to keep it, but I knew that staying around wouldn't be a smart move (maybe this was wrong to do?) After some time I got together with a childhood friend who I've been dating for the past 3 years.
Now he's been saying he has an ex who lied and cheated on him to people we both know. What could I have done better here?
I don't want to date them. I'm not interested.
It happens everywhere, and it's especially sensitive in places I frequent (diners, cafe, work) but I genuinely just want to be left alone.
No matter what I do I come off as rude somehow.
>Sit at diner
>Waitress won't stop chatting
>Order comes, I didn't order a drink but she brought coffee with it
>I don't drink coffee past 2pm, so I don't drink it.
>leave after my meal
>next time I sit they literally don't serve me, like the waitresses wouldn't come even when I called or sat at the stools.
It's just fucking stressful
2 years experience got thrown into the deep end being a Project Lead for my section, on top of all the other projects I'm meant to be working on.
I think about quitting everyday. Every single fucking day. But I don't know where I can pivot my career to.
I'm getting stress ulcers just thinking about work.
I'm good with CAD, I can do mechanical/vibrational analysis, I'm at least uni-level at Maths (not Mathematician-level though).
I started using it in 2011, around that time I didn't get as much attention on it but when I did, it led to a relationship.
Now, it's just attention seeking, foodie calls, bored females, fat women catfishing and even if I get a date, I'm super tired of them already.
Probably because most of the time I will lose interest or I will get ghosted/friendzoned. So I'm completely unmotivated now.
My last relationship ended in december of last year and we were together for over a year. It was completely different from the rest for various reasons.
Most importantly, we met IRL. I actually cold approached a few women in 2022 when I was living in a bigger city and I got a gf out of it.
But now I live in a shithole with no people, feel zero motivation to go to a city to cold approach (there is very little opportunity for it anyways).
So I guess the advice I seek is - should I just ditch OLD, actually start going out in a city and just grow a pair once again to do it?
How do I motivate myself for it and stop beeing such a negative thinker?
Fast forward I am 40 now and genuinely unable to talk in any online medium.
Private Discord? Banned within 4 messages.
Online MMORPG? Mass reported within 1-2 messages.
Youtube live stream chat? After 2 messages, "Sorry man, you have to go. You can't act like this..."
The thing is... I dont have controversial beliefs. I am not rude, I am not mean, I dont insult people until they insult me and they've already had a community meltdown over nothing.
It seems society is just so hyper sensitive, I can't even say anything without instantly having THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY attack me after just the first or second message.
I want to know what I am doing wrong, or if it is just society and the internet has become unusable unless you're a virtue signaling NPC?
I have resorted to taking any post I make and putting into ChatGPT and telling it to make it as nice as possible. It then neuters the content so badly, that my opinion ceases to exist. To the point where I never post the result bc it is so meaningless.
It is so bad, even when I try so fucking hard to be as soft and as nice as humanly possible, I still get banned. In fact, when I am NICE and SOFT is when people are MORE aggressive and MORE quick to ban me. I have found ironically the most effective way to post is to be as aggressive and brutal as possible. I last the longest this way, with the least number of people fighting me. Still same end result but not as quick and not as bad. Like straight up attacking people and false accusations will make everyone shut up and leave me alone, I suspect bc everyone is so soft now?
I cant even tell someone a scientific fact without it being required to be transforned into some "My Truth, Your Truth" bullshit. I cant refer to braindead low iq subhuman takes as "Wrong" or "That's dumb."
I will post some examples...
![1713925235628203[1]](https://i.4cdn.org/adv/1713961556564797s.jpg)
>buy nuts as an afternoon snack
>eat a handful of nuts
>suddenly nauseous
Am I allergic?
What's a better mid-afternoon snack for the office?
But I can definitely leech off enough money for a university degree in south east Asia. 3 years and then at least I'll have some qualification to find some kind of job. I'll be starting some career in marketing or whatever at 40. Too stupid for IT or tech.
Or should I just keep cruising and not care anymore because it's too late? I have heart arrhythmia, don't sleep, twitch my eyelids constantly because of the stress and anxiety of what will happen when the money runs out. It's dark and lonely and I have no friends. All I want is a paycheck and some friends and to continue living on this side of the world.
I use it to track macros and record lifts, GPS, all that but how the fuck do I stop being distracted by it. Actually. Tired of spending 5 hours on my glownigger every day.
https://rentry.org/5737yc8h
Helpful links:
>Aggregate of hundreds of scientific research studies on porn
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research/
>A few examples that have shown porn to have negative effects:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37267113/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24674621/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26095441/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26606725/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24871202/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27527226/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28477937/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24674621/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28276929/
>How porn addiction works (3:06)
https://youtu.be/1Ya67aLaaCc [Embed]
>Practical effects of porn usage on the brain (4:25)
https://youtu.be/9qJHRvHU8IM [Embed]
Your brain on porn, summarized (17:21)
https://youtu.be/jAgUGBVjWXs [Embed]
>How to start quitting porn (10:30)
https://youtu.be/eoVkQDDNa0g [Embed]
Methods of quitting:
>AVRT:
https://imgur.com/a/lJ4m3dC
>Tech lockdown:
https://www.youtube.com/@techlockdown5069
>Porn blockers:
https://blockerx.net/
https://accountable2you.com/
https://www.pluckeye.net/
https://www.covenanteyes.com/
>I don't have a problem and I don't want to quit.
Then this thread is not for you. It is for people who recognize they have an issue and would like to get better.
>I don't want to tell other people about this.
That's your choice, but accountability is hugely helpful to any recovering addict; harmful behavior thrives in secrecy.
>I just need a girlfriend, how do I get one?
There are dozens of other threads on /adv/ for that, you can "tfw no gf" elsewhere
Previous thread: >>31019481
Please help keep bumped if you'd like this thread to stay up!
Should I try to be a normalfag or is it over?
>her: I've been thinking lately and I feel comfortable with you, I would lie to you if I said you are a perfect man, but you are perfect for me, so let's get married, the fact that I'm asking you irritates me but take this as a signal that Im certain about us
>me: I don't know, you said you don't want children and I really want to have children, this is a deal breaker to me
>her: That's it? That's your reason? You see that's the thing, at first I thought you're not the one to play games with emotions and commitment and I found it very comforting, but now it turns out you are just like my other exes, all you're asking from me is "insurance" for your commitment, a child is like a wedding ring in your eyes. You're just as shallow as everyone else.
>me: I wasn't not your first kiss, your first love or your first time. You have nothing to prove to me that I'm special to you at any degree, if I wasn't the 'first one' that means I may as well be just "another one" among the men you have been with. I understand that a child may not be a guarantee that we will stay together forever but at least will be a proof that I'm the man you loved the most
>She starts sobbing and leave the apartment
She used to be a slut, at least i want her to give me something that she has never given to another man if she truly wants my commitment. Is that too much to ask? I just want to feel I'm special to her.
I guess he thought his contribution was already overwhelming so he sat his lazy ass on the bed and decided to scroll and do jack shit, didn’t even offer to help.
Not only that but he always leaves a bunch of receipts on the kitchen counter like trash for me to deal with instead of throwing them out or just putting them in the receipt drawer (which would literally take the same amount of time) which I’ve already asked him to do 100 times.
This time I found the receipt on the floor, and started to get really annoyed. I asked him to put it away. He didn’t get up. I went back into the room and asked him to put it away. He told me to go fuck myself. I snapped and took the receipt from the ground and put it between the mattress and bed frame (by the way he has extremely poor hygiene so this wouldn’t bother him as much as one might think).
He flipped out and started running towards me and yelling at me in an intimidating manner. He took flour from the counter and threw it at my face and head. He said “I WOULD NEVER LEAVE ANYTHING LIKE THIS” because I made us pancakes this morning, and I hadn’t gotten around to perfectly cleaning up yet, cause I didn’t have the energy after making them, as I’m still recovering from stomach flu. It was only 1-2 hrs later.
I told him I’m still sick and he laughed and said no you’re not.
Anyway later he washed the dishes and did other chores and shit but he never apologized.
I get that I contributed to the situation but he’s such a massive piece of shit, and the only times I even get mad at him is when I’ve asked him to do something 4000 times and he still doesn’t give a fuck. What advice do you have? He also keeps gaslighting me.
dunno what to do. too many conflicting ideas in my head. I worked on my shit, and I want her to apologize too but that's so controlling and never going to happen. I'm also bad at dealing with mixed feelings about people in general either (they're both good and bad? no they must be either good or bad!).
how am I gonna fix this?
My girlfriend of 7 years broke up with me a few days ago. I'm completely lost and dejected. The breakup blindsided me. The future I had planned for years is gone.
The problem is we were highschool sweethearts. I haven't been in highschool for over 5 years.
I have no idea how to date, how to progress a relationship, where to find single women (that aren't just whores), what makes a good date, how to date in general, etc.
I got my now ex-gf just by saying "I like you, will you be my gf?" once after class.
So does anyone male or female have any tips about entering the dating world for a guy that has never dated?
He left me when pregnant. for the girl he assaulted and had a no contact order with.
>not my problem, have fun being lonely, depressed, rejected by society, and also tortured daily by being forced to see women happily getting into relationships with other men and not even looking your way.
>Have fun doing that until you die of old age, missing out on a life you could only dream of!
How is a man in such a peril supposed to continue on sanely, tell me…
I've been single for so long I've given up on being with women. How can I transition into being gay so that I can finally be with someone and not die alone?
I've tried jacking off to gay porn every day for a week now (I can never manage to finish and have difficulty getting hard). I always frustratingly switch back to straight porn. No matter what I do, I just get grossed out by gay sex and even the thought of kissing a man disgusts me. This needs to change and FAST. What should I do? If I could be gay by the end of the year that would be great.
We're broken up, living separately, doing individual and couples therapy, working on individual goals, have improved tremendously on most of the issues that caused us to grow apart in the first place, feeling much happier and getting along a lot better, can actually see a healthy future for us now.
One problem, she is seeing someone else. She sees me a couple of times a week and sees him a couple of times a week. She insists she wants to be with me but says she still needs time to work through her feelings about what I did to her and isn't ready to commit to me until she does. It's been a little over 2 months. The other guy is kind of a mess and I'm not really worried they're going to end up together. He's firmly fling material and not relationship material. They're already fighting and running into problems.
I've been trying to withhold intimacy until she is ready to commit to me but I've cracked a couple of times. She does not want me to see anyone else and I haven't even though I have options. I'm in love with her and want to get back together.
How long do I tolerate this arrangement before I accept that it's over and start moving on? I've been pretty chill about things and I don't want to try to force her hand. I want her to pick me on her own. I know that she really loves me and I'm fairly confident that she'll soon feel like she "got even" and come back to me, but maybe I'm being delusional. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me and letting our relationship collapse and then cheating on her was the dumbest thing I have ever done, but we've really pinpointed the issues that led us to this place and either fixed them or are in the process of fixing them.
>Tl;dr
Cheated on my gf. We are separated, working through our issues, seeing each other, but she insists on also seeing someone else for the time being.
I shoot black and white photographs and have always loved black and white movies and documentaries, so I plan to start recording all my content in black and white.
Would you watch a black and white YT channel? Do you thing black and white would enhance the mindfullness and meditation theme?
I should've picked an easier degree like CS. I know how to code but companies won't take me seriously without a degree/cert.
What the hell do I do? I'm 22, is it too late to change majors?
I have a passion for it, I don't even have in mind some big money, just that it would be enough to survive.
I don't know what should I do, how to promote myself, I only know that I need to get better, but I think it's not enough.
Any advice appreciated.
picrel not mine.
>Yapping
>Blud
>Mid
>Yo
>Broooo
>Waffling
I swear to God, every single community in every corner of the internet; you will find people speaking like this, its so fucking annoying. Anywhere where this isn't prevalent?
It does lead me to wonder what it is about nurses though that seems to make them more promiscuous. Are promiscuous women simply drawn to that job, or is there something about the job that turns women that way? Like the odd hours, being surrounded by old dying people or whatever?
Also, I obviously don't want to screw it up by pressuring her; I'm happy enough as it is with what she's willing to do with me, but I am a tad disappointed that anal seems to be completely off the table. Do you think there's any wiggle room to get her to at least try it in the future? I mean, it's not like she tried it once or twice and decided it didn't feel good. She seems to have not done it at all, yet is writing it off. Any thoughts on that, or should I just forget it?
My girlfriend lined up some bar trivia for her and her housemate and I and it turns out that incidentally another girl who I really don't get along with (or more to the point, really doesn't like me, think very brief fling who's pissed I'm dating someone younger) is going to be there along with a couple of mutual friends. This girl has caused no small amount of issues for me, costing me friends and stirring up drama.
Normally I wouldn't care that much but this particular girl is a scene causing histrionic chick and there's no way we can both be at the same bar without some sort of issue. If I turn up, it's going to make things awkward for everyone and I'll just be uncomfortable.
I don't otherwise tell my gf who she can and can't see and I haven't in this case either, however I feel uncomfortable and hurt that a partner would have any sort of social interaction with someone who's caused me some big issues, said awful things to and about me and cost me friends.
>just go anyway
you're right, I should.
>schizophrenic
>will be homeless in a few months as I'm effectively getting kicked out by my family
how do I not kill myself
thanks
i normally wouldn`t care about this, but hating pretty much everyone is really starting to exhaust me
feels very bad, man.
Admittedly, I have already done something like this twice, but it's just me singing the song, without the instrumental. I uploaded it but I really do want to learn how to sync up my lyrics to instrumentals and make a proper song cover. I recorded those two instances with Audacity and then just took the raw file. Thanks in advance to anyone who answers.
Do you guys have tips/books idk that would help?
What are the proper precautions I should take to make sure I do not get sick cooking meat at home
Will any chaste Catholic girl ever take me as husband? Should I confess this to them?
The person who was taking my order was a girl. Obviously of legal age, probably in her twenties if I had to gander.
After I paid for my order she, not looking at me at all the entire time, kind of just dropped my biscuit on the counter without even handing it over to me and moved on to the next customer.
Now, I’m not the best looking guy I can admit that. Most women look towards the floor when I pass them. But isn’t that too much disrespect from someone who was clearly uggophobic. I’m still a customer and human.
I’ve been thinking about it the entire day.
I feel kind of bad now should I apologize? Sometimes I feel like he's being a real faggot and needs the shit kicked out of him but I don't think he's a bad dude
Im 21, never had any aspirations other than immediate survival. The jobs i used to work barely even gave survivable money.. SOOOO NOW WHAT ?!!!
I cant even think of any motivations or any dreams or anything i just want my biological needs met.
I dont sleep on a bed i sleep on a uneven plywood boards. I barely even buy vegetables from the grocery store, i pick wild grape leaves for that. I do not consume any unnecessary products. I do not dress fancy and i do not care.
Upon earning every paycheck i give the money to my mom so she can pay rent.
I dont want to sound greedy on the college application either. I dont want to offend someone in the office by asking for too much. If i tick their nerves they can use their power to kick me. Especially since there's probably half a million like me trying to get in
If i say
"To get a respectable education to work a respectable job where i can earn respectable money" I can imagine my old boss going "Respectable myass, NOBODY who asks for respect deserves it"
I just cant think of anything else rn.
If i ask for something it might mean in their twisted minds that i dont deserve it. That im lying or something.
Seriously, i just want to be a welder and i just want enough for a family.
Usually when a corporation asks opinion questions they are expecting a corporation approved anwser.
Im unfamiliar with these kinds of questions and i dont want to sound like a desperate peasant. Or god forbid, i accidentally offend an office ladies feelings by accident.
Im EXTREMELY unfamiliar with these kinds of questions, seriously guys i need your help.
Entirety is filled with 40 minutes "analogy" videos where some dumbass reads the script, there are very few channels that are made purely for entertainment and bring something genuine up, whether it's some story (Internet Historian) or whatever the fuck happened (Turkey Tom unironically) with the goonclown shit.
That's about it, that's the only genuinely good content unless you are also into fitness, which will get you to watch the stuff only if you're a beginner or actually learning something but once you've learned it's all unnecessary.
Also the fucking comment sections, it feels like everything is filled with bots with normie milennial tier memes.
Where do you even find genuinely fun content to watch that's being made by someone who's actually having fun doing it? I don't care if the main reason is money, of course it is but I just want something that isn't reading off the script of some game and calling it a deep analysis or some shit.
Is this the Nature's way to tell me I'm not supposed to be single and I should be getting a wife and start making babies?
she seems to be attracted or interested in me, looked at me multiple times, flipped her hair when walk by me, nervous or uncomfortable around me, etc.
>be at party with friend, friend's gf and other people
>friend leaves early because he has work in the morning, his gf stays
>we play a lot of drinking games and get drunk
>his gf sticks to me because she doesn't know anyone else there that well
>end of the night she is always holding onto my arm, I feel a bit uncomfortable about it but chalk it up to her being drunk
>people start leaving, I say I'm going to bed cuz drunk and tired
>say goodnight and go to bedroom (I have stayed here before and it's normal, guy who owns the house is my friend)
>go to sleep
>wake up to friend's gf crawling into bed asking if she can sleep in there because she doesn't know or trust the other guys, I say okay because idgaf and go back to sleep
>at some point wake up again and she is bouncing on my dick
>too drunk/sleepy to really understand the situation, monkey brain go "Oh I'm having sex apparently" so just let it happen and pass out again when it's over
>wake up in the morning, think it may have been a dream and hope it was a dream
>nope, friend's gf is naked next to me
>she apologizes profusely, says it was a mistake, makes me promise not to tell him and we can forget it happened, she'll owe me a debt etc. bullshit like this
>texted me every day begging me not to say anything
>supposed to hang out with them again this weekend
What would you do in this situation? Btw this was me losing my virginity on top of everything.
>also hated me for being shit at sports and an uncoordinated, timid spaz, signed me up for basketball, baseball, soccer, and football, all of which were humiliating experiences. I had to beg him, on my knees and in tears, to not force me to play.
>eventually move and end contact with him
>haven’t spoken with him since, nor have I responded to his attempts to reach out, except for a rage-fueled text message I sent him telling him I constantly thought about killing myself, partially because of what he did to me
>brother is getting married later this year, and our dad will be there
>99.9% certain he’s going to try and engage with me at the wedding
>I’m an anxious mess prone to having public and embarrassing meltdowns, especially in the last few years
Has anyone ever had a similar experience? Any ideas on how to mentally prepare to see/speak with him again? I’ve come up with a lot of strategies about preparing to shut him down if he tries to engage, but I don’t know what he’s going to try, or how I’m going to react. I haven’t told my mom or brother about the extent of what he did because I’m afraid to embarrass myself that much, and I also don’t want to be disappointed if my brother invites him anyway, knowing what he did to me.
I’m going through a traumatic break up and I can’t enjoy my hobbies like I used to. I can’t do any of them. I am growing so bored and just want distraction but the only time I’m distracted is social engagement.
My friends however are fully able to be alone and isolate and play their games but I legit can’t. I am just spending my days dumbing my mind down with social media and I wanna stop but I cannot focus on anything that isn’t taking the pain away. And the worst part is, the anxiety the god awful anxiety.
I just want to move on. Nothing in my life has changed without her, she fucked everything up months ago. I’ve already grieved the failed relationship but the recovery is fucking traumatic.
How the fuck do I find enjoyment again? How the fuck can I concentrate on my hobbies I can’t get in flow state. I can’t read or pick anything new up. I’ve “let it flow” like a billion times already and I don’t feel any better each time.
I’m just waiting because I’m just about to start college.
If I sit alone it eats me alive. I can’t distract alone unless there is social interaction. I’ve confronted these feelings a billion times. I just want the voices inside me to stop tormenting me and I wanna enjoy life again. I’m free. I wanna explore and experience joy what the fuck do I do.
I was at the local arcade and got talking to the girl that works there (she's like 17yo) and she's friends with Sarah but hasn't seen her in a couple of months.
We talked on and off for like an hour (She had to help other customers), anyway, I made a solid point of commenting how I thought Sarah was cute and asked the Arcade chick knew if she Sarah was single.
Do you think Arcade chick will tell Sarah about me asking/saying shes cute?
inb4 just ask Sarah - oh trust me I will, but I'm just curious.
I know it's something I'll deal with for the rest of my life. But I'm currently in a stressful time in my life, and I can't stop eating. I'm a food junkie. And I would greatly appreciate any kind of advice, no matter how simple.
Approximately when I was 6 years old, because of very complex family issues, it became an addiction and now it is completely my fault, because I always try to get out of the fucking loop but I give up. One day, I would like to give my future children that education that I didnt have. And I can't do it by being a shitty fat (not as an insult to fat people, i refer to myself)
-im not that obese like the photo, but im almost 15 kg over my weight-
Thank you anon. I hope you too can solve your problems and live your best life, whatever your age. Its never too late, fella.
Every morning I nearly give myself a heart attack, every evening I drink until I pass out.
I’ve been doing this a few years drinking isn’t even fun anymore, because of withdrawals and caffeine I have become a very anxious person.
I know if I continue my guts will go bad, I’m super skinny too because both habits make me not hungry.
I kind of just want to go cold turkey on both but I’m kind of afraid the withdrawals may be too strong.
I work my ass off at a blue collar job so it would obviously be hell for a week.
I’m done being in this cycle, I want to move on with my life.
I’m basically just killing myself over some dumbass addictions that don’t even make me feel any better.
Any tips or advice? My alcohol addiction is bad enough that I start dreaming crazy and get drenched in sweat at night but it goes away after 2 days, I’m kind of scared because I knew a guy who died quitting beer.
I think no caffeine should just make me feel tired and a headache.
Is there any medication or therapy that actually works? I was on escalitalopram, but it didn't help, then I tried NOW Moot Support and Lion's Mane, but those didn't work either. Instead of feeling sad, I just couldn't feel emotions at all. Even though I've suffered from chronic depression for the past 10+ years, I am still able to laugh, smile, and feel happiness occasionally. Just not as often or intensely as I used to. So I quit the pills because I decided that even if I feel bad most of the time, feeling good sometimes is better than not feeling anything at all. I also don't want to grow TOO dependent on medication. As for the physical pain and sleeplessness: I take either ibuprofen or acetaminophen for the pain, and either diphenhydramine or meltanonin to help me feel asleep.
>did you know my ex used to do that too
>my ex had such a big impact on my life
>i wasnt the same after i broke up with my ex
Like seriously, i cant stop thinking about her ex now
There’s this girl who one of my best friends had a thing for who recently has been flirting with me super hard, kissed me at a party etc and has pretty clearly been hinting at wanting to date asking me to hang with her solo. In the interest of full disclosure I talked to my friend about it thinking he’d appreciate the heads up, wouldn’t mind since it was awhile ago etc, and honestly it went pretty awfully. He went full incel, calling her a whore, talking about how the flirting ruins every group setting we’re in and how he never wants to see her, etc.
What do you guys think? She’s cute, charming, and in general I don’t get a lot of female attention, especially the woman being as forward as this. On the one hand, bros before hoes, but on the other hand, his reaction was so ridiculously over the top that it makes me want to disregard him and go for it. There’s also the fact that he tends to fall for every moderately attractive chick and “claim” them for himself, like hell right now there’s two other women he’s orbiting for months and not making a move on. Feel like at a certain point it’s more of his problem than anyone else’s.
She idolizes characters like Makima, Esdeath, etc. to give you an idea.
The other day we were talking about sexual acts, and she brought up pegging and how she would like to try it on me. She apparently finds the idea of giving (penetrating) and me receiving (taking) "attractive, empowering, and appealing".
I declined saying it's emasculating, and then she started talking about contemporary views on sex and how being masculine/feminine are social constructs that should be dismantled. How there are only 'active' and 'passive' roles, and taking on a passive role wouldn't make me less of a man. She even was perplexed at the idea of it being 'role reversal' or penetrating being exclusively male.
I believe gender roles exist; therefore role-reversal exists where the man (who is primarily the one who penetrates) is being penetrated. I believe role-reversal displays the man in a feminine position of receiving, and therefore takes away his masculinity.
I believe that people would subconsciously lose respect for a man if they were aware of him taking a feminine (receiving) position in sex, due to his respect being tied socially to his perception of masculinity. I believe the appeal behind pegging is the loss of power, control, and respect for the man, and the fact that she suggested this act sickens me. I do not want to lose her respect, or lose respect for myself.
This would've been fine if she understood me, but she thinks my views are backwards and objectively wrong, and wants me to 'fix them'.
I feel mad at her for thinking I'm 'weak' enough to suggest the act in the first place, which I guess comes from a place of insecurity, but I don't know how to fix it. It changed how I view her quite a bit and I don't want that. I want to love her as I did a week ago.
I'm also conflicted because I'm also a bit curious, but my psyche says it would be devastating to my mental health.
Help?
This was the case even when I had "friends". On the rare occasion that I did hang out with people, it wasn't as fun or fulfilling as I hoped it would be.
So I'm stuck in this weird area where being alone makes me lonely and miserable, but "social" activities are boring and exhausting.
>inb4: you're a fag, you care to much about your classmates, you should focus on your classes
yeah i know, but i can't help myself.
I got fired from my last job for incompetence and got a new, better paying job 3 months later. I was lucky and told myself I would try my best this time around.
I’m trying but I keep messing up and now I’m at a dilemma.
I keep messing up a month and a half in and I’m trying my best.so why is this happening?
I’ve self reflected all day today and realized I might be depressed.
I moved away from my home town for this job and feel so alone.
I have so many years of experience doing this line of work but ever since i moved out here I’ve been having trouble concentrating and being alert. When you make a mistake at this new job, everyone is basically alerted about it.
I don’t eat and can hardly sleep.
Sorry for the info dump but i just wanted to share with someone.
I think i might get fired again soon. Tomorrow I will do my absolute best to not mess up at all. The people like me at my job but I think the small mistakes are slowly adding up.
I feel so deflated.
Am I just not being man enough and sucking up my situation? I feel like quitting almost I’m so deflated.
If anyone has anything to say, I’ll read it. Thanks.
>see girl eyeing me
>approach her
>we dance and drink and end up going back to her hotel room
>we get into bed
>she tells me I can take my clothes off (in a non-sexual way imo)
>I do
>we cuddle and go to sleep
>she ghosts me the next day
Was the sex supposed to happen then? I didn’t get any indicators she wanted to fuck. We didn’t even kiss much. we made out for a bit at the club but she pulled away after a few seconds each time.
We were both drunk and very tired when we got to her hotel. It didn’t seem like she wanted to fuck.
I wanted to meet her then next day and have sex then but like I said she ghosted.
How do I get a girlfriend? Do people hate me? Why do they hate me?
>Doesn't want to eat vegetables
>Swallows pills like M&Ms, doesn't follow prescription
>Manipulates others using pity
It drives my mother nuts
Any tips you can share so my mother can handle this saggy gremlin?
>inb4 send her to a retirement home
My mother loves her too much to do that unfortunately
I would like to have hair like picrel but after years of trying I simply cannot. Not exactly sure what this style is called, but sorta "forward" and covering the forehead. Even if I put shit in my hair it will naturally part to the sides. I'd say it's about 4-5ish inches long on top rn. I'd like to have shorter hair as it gets in my face.
Should I get a korean perm? Where does one even get a perm? Not a broccoli hair one but a very moderate one to the point where you can't really notice that I have a perm at all, it just looks like beach waves or something. Can a white guy do that?
Also says that I love her for than she loves me if she does love me.
She's also told me in the past she's not really physically attracted to me, not her "ideal" look
This should be a very easy reason for a guy to leave the relationship, but for whatever reason.
I feel like she's going to monkey branch as soon as the opportunity arises or cheat on me if she doesn't already.
Please talk some sense into me.
Getting bored, should I get a job?
should I get this shirt or is it dumb?
I've had a thing for my coworker for a very long time, we've worked together for two years or so. We always flirt heavily at work but she has a boyfriend so it never really went much deeper than that. However, about a week ago she invited me out to a bar with some other people we work with, her bf was with her as well. Anyway we got fucking trashed, near blackout drunk. I started flirting hard with her in front of her boyfriend, she was giggling and leaning into it, right in front of this dude. The worst part is the guy did absolutely nothing about it lmao.
She texted me the next morning saying that she knew I was into her, but that she was happy with her bf and that she probably shouldnt hang out with me anymore, to which I told her I totally understand. So she removed me on all socials and we didnt talk for a few days but next time we worked together she was all over me. Flirting just like before, in fact this time she seemed even more into me.
What the fuck is happening? Does she just want attention or is she telling me shes into it?
>as a child be severely bullied and occasionally abused at home
>grow up in extremely aggressive house hold
>take anger out on animals and no one batted an eye because it’s the south
>beat the shit out of other kids mercilessly when got the chance without authority looking
>would bite people and be an over all bastard
>stopped getting bullied in Highschool due to extremely volatile behavior and vivid threats, became bloatmaxxed fatbuff
>have had years of therapy
>done a lot of maturing
>found religion years later in teen years
>drastic change in behavior due to feelings of guilt
>would call myself quite devout
>23 now and even with all this feelings haven’t left.
The answer I usually get?
>the Bible says humans are primarily evil, don’t feel bad!
This answer should suffice bc I’m Christian but it doesn’t.
>feel really good being selfish
>feel really good being an asshole
>always compelled to be the villain in games
>idealizes terrible people in history and today times and fiction
(I.e Genghis Khan, Adolf Hitler, Stalin, Jeff Bezos)
>megalomaniacal ideations
>enjoys games of where you can be/are the villain even with extremely context
>there’s more details but I’m intentionally avoiding them, you can probably assume.
I channel this all in my roles in Acting, TTRPGS, and aforementioned video games. I find heroic runs quite boring.
Everyone calls me a good person because I do good things. But it brings me no fulfillment in measure as much as being bad would.
Why am I so compelled to this? Is it the trauma? Is it because im hurt still? The ideation of “I want to burn the world because of you” is so intense in me, but yet I hold no grudges to anyone in particular. Just hatred for the world. I want to be good, I want to FEEL good doing good. But I don’t. Why is this still anything on going? No matter how much I mature and grow as a person.
I also stopped exercising because it was taking up too much time during the school year. I'm going to start doing this again once the semester ends, though.
In total, in a little over a year I gained 40 pounds, and am now at a little over 180.
What can I do about my stomach and diet? I feel the constant need to eat so that my stomach doesn't bother me. I've tried drinking a lot of water, but it's only temporary and then I just need to piss a lot.
serious question
Made a list in order of my problems
>visual hallucinations
>Paranoia and depression
>Sleeping is horrible, I can’t rest, I have nightmares. Memories repeat
. I know I’m dreaming and they don’t let me leave
>Weight goes up and down every month between 36 to 40
>I am filled with anxiety
>Derealisation is the only way I can function
>If my parents don’t take advantage of me someone else will
Is it understandable? Cause I know I’ll mess up
Which problem do I give more priority to? They all suck
I really like preppy or fit white women. Generally just cute clean cut white chicks basically
However I am pretty swarthy. I definitely don't look white in the summer time, at all.
On top of that my arms and hands are covered in tattoos. I am also very musclar
Granted I have a pretty handsome face, I often worry that the kind of women I'm into won't really dig me back, basically because I'm not white and I'm covered in tattoos.
As a result I don't really try talking to any of them. I used to date a lot of these types I met through dating apps but I deleted those awhile ago and I think they're all BS.
I just want to know if my type is out of my league
or if I have a shot
I've been on random cam chat sites just talking to people and I've been complimented on how versatile I am conversation wise, but I feel like I could do better
Being an interesting person goes beyond just knowing how to talk to other people and keep a conversation going, it's about practicing new things, hobbies and experiences, because ultimately that's how you build an interesting collection of knowledges to talk about
I think reading more books or studying philosophy could help but I don't even know where to start
I finished reading fight club, and I started Neuromancer (it's being a difficult read desu)
I always wanted to live life like in anime or manga. I know that's not possible. That it's all fake. That it's all engineered so that losers like me would buy it. But my fuck, what I wouldn't give to be surrounded by anime characters. They are true, they don't lie, they don't put masks on. And 2D > 3DPD. By far. I've actually never been that interested in real women. All real people seem very strange to me. I am not interested in having real-life friendships at all. I do not like being around people. I spent my teenage years trying to force myself to be different, to go out, to party etc., but it never worked and in fact it was probably why I ended up in a mental institution at 17 and missed a grade. I'm guessing that on some level normies sensed I was faking and they rejected my attempts at creating bonds with them. I just don't want to do it, no matter what people think or say about me. Truth be told, this website is probably the only place where I interact with other people and I seriously don't care if anyone thinks that's pathetic. I don't want more.
But I would like living in an anime world. I'd especially like to have a 2D girlfriend. I've never met a woman I'd actually give enough of a shit about to put my dick in her. I seriously don't care about sex with 3D women (or men) at all.
So anyway, how do I get over these feelings? They come and go and it's actually been a very long time since I felt this way. But it is annoying. I'm 27 and I still use anime or manga as escapism. I enter delusions that last for days. I know that life as it is represented in anime and manga is completely impossible, especially in Japan, where there's no way in h*ck a student would just go straight home after school to chill. I also know I don't like people. But how do I stop feeling this way for good? How can I become grounded in reality? Thank you.
