>>205687
>>I have to take xanax and kratom
>>my brain is physically friend and my body aged like a decade in one year
>Guaran-fucking-tee the drug use is not helping you.

0.25 xanax 1g kratom only on training nights. It's barely anything. I just need the anxiety to diminish enough that I can even stand being in my skin on the mat. I was a drunk for a decade but only when I had to do social stuff. And frankly I was much happier but it's impossible to balance the two hobbies (drinking and athletics) at my age. But not a fucking second goes by that I don't wish I was just throwing darts at a bar again charming some young chick. Not a second.

>I promise this stress/pressure exists only in your mind. NO ONE in the gym is looking at you thinking, "haha look at that loser", they're probably looking at you thinking "damn I hope I can still go that hard when I'm that age".

Who says I'm concerned with their opinions? I'm the one who hates myself.

>We've got a brown belt coach in our gym. He's a little younger than you but he's still often injured. With lower belts he's a "lazy" roll, he'll just hold positions and let you work. With upper belts/young competitors he often gets smashed. He stopped competing a while ago. Not exactly a world beater desu.
>And ya know what? We fuckin' love that dude. He's the most popular guy at the gym. Literally everyone smiles when they see him. He's constantly coaching and helping guys figure stuff out. Having him there is a blessing and we'd be bummed as hell if he wasn't there.

I ain't nobody's friend. I'm friendly, but I've been around the block plenty of times. No such thing as friends. I've given and given and given to BJJ and it's given nothing back. This guy might be happy in that role. Good for him.

>But please don't think that these problems are insurmountable or your life is over.

You see, it never began. It was one false start after another. A sunk cost fallacy at this point. I don't even like BJJ. I don't like ANYTHING.

Back | Go to board

Board:

/xs/

Thread:

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu GeneralOld thread is waaay past its bump limit edition.Having fun murdering your friends…

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu General
Old thread is waaay past its bump limit edition.
Having fun murdering your friends…