>>39132591
support her, affirm her choices, and ask how you can be there for her
for instance
>(if american) figuring out what surgeons are in-network, ensure those surgeons are in network for the procedure she wants, and the requirements for insurance to cover it
>being there for her first few rounds of electrolysis if she's nervous
>booking a hotel and driving her to/from post-op appointments until she's able to drive again
>getting things like ice packs, pads, a donut pillow (those things are so helpful), disposable underwear, etc
you'll want to take 2-3 weeks off to help. at minimum, be there for her entire hospital stay. some nurses are absolute shitheads who will misgender, withhold medication, etc and you are in a much better position to advocate for her than she is
it's also really easy to fall once you've lost a lot of blood to a multi-hour surgery, so having someone to walk with you when you want (instead of waiting for the nurses to find time) means a lot
some hospitals have dogshit food, so having someone who can go get better food is also helpful (and is also a necessity if you go to a hotel after discharge)
i hope you're not squeamish around bodily fluids because if she has a catheter, you'll have to help void it (empty the bag) after she's discharged
when travelling to/from the hospital, something i found out the hard way was i was super sensitive. i felt every little bump and crack in the road, and when highway construction forced us to drive on the shoulder, it was absolute hell. even if you live in town, it may be worth booking a nearby hotel
and be prepared to go through a LOT more TP. especially the first couple months, she will spray everywhere and will go through a roll every 1-2 days. it gets better over time, but you can expect baseline TP usage to at least double

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